One Unbeaten Team Remains. The Defending Champion Has Not Won a Game.

Week 3 cut the top of The Table down to one name. Week 4 brings three rubber matches and a series the champion has never won.

ForcedToPlay00 is 6-0. Nobody else is. Dicker? Barely Know Her! came into Week 3 unbeaten and left on the wrong end of 128 to 99. Forced has the best all-time record in the league and no championships. Both facts are still true.

Waterboy trailed Total Mayehem 28 to 0 after Thursday. By Monday it had 139 points and its first win of the season. Mayehem lost by 11 and still got its first win too, from the weekly median. It beat a statistic. The statistic has not commented.

Last week, this paper suggested the margin in Kraft’s game was probably sitting on Kraft’s bench. We keep receipts, including our own. Daejon Love scored 172, the highest score of the season, and won by 86, the largest margin of the season. Kraft left 13 points on the bench. A perfect lineup would still have lost by 73. The bench is cleared of all charges.

Burrow me in TDs, the defending champion, is 0-6. Its opponent today is Total Mayehem, which has beaten it both times they’ve met. The trophy has never been the problem. Mayehem has.

Gibbs me all the TDs is 5-1 while scoring like a 3-3 team. By the numbers, that makes it the luckiest team in the league. Its opponent, Collins It Like I See It, has played Gibbs four times, more than any other pairing on the card, and won once, by 4.

Operation: Air Raid is 0-6 and has scored like a team with two wins. It remains the unluckiest team in the league. Luck has been informed.

Two matchups have yet to score a point. Sunday has them.

The Tape — Week 4

Records include the weekly median game. Scores are through London.

MATCH OF THE WEEK · THE RUBBER MATCH, TOP-SHELF EDITION

The Season’s Highest Score Meets the Team That Just Lost Its Zero.

One team just scored 172. The other just lost for the first time.

Daejon Love (5-1) vs. Dicker? Barely Know Her! (4-2) Series: 1-1. Daejon won 2024 Week 2 by 6.78. Dicker won 2025 Week 5 by 15.96. Through London: Daejon 11.7, Dicker 6.5.

Across two meetings, Dicker has outscored Daejon 214 to 205. The series is tied anyway.

MATCHUP TO WATCH, NO. 1 · THE LAST UNBEATEN

Forced Has Lost to Waterboy Before. By 35.

Waterboy (2-4) vs. ForcedToPlay00 (6-0) Series: 1-1. Waterboy won 2024 Week 13 by 35.32. Forced won 2025 Week 8 by 21.0. Through London: Forced 18.7, Waterboy 5.4.

Last week Waterboy came back from 28 down. This week it is down 13.

MATCHUP TO WATCH, NO. 2 · THE CHAMPION’S PROBLEM

Burrow Has a Title. Burrow Does Not Have a Win Over Mayehem.

Total Mayehem (1-5) vs. Burrow me in TDs (0-6) Series: Mayehem leads 2-0. Its largest win was 19.02 in 2024 Week 9. Through London: Burrow 6.0, Mayehem 3.0.

Neither team has won a head-to-head game this season. One of them will today, and history has a preference.

MATCHUP TO WATCH, NO. 3 · THE MOST-PLAYED RIVALRY ON THE CARD

Four Meetings. Collins Has Won One, by 4.

Collins It Like I See It (3-3) vs. Gibbs me all the TDs (5-1) Series: Gibbs leads 3-1. Gibbs’s largest win was 26.12 in 2024 Week 15. Collins’s only win came in 2024 Week 9, by 3.76. Through London: Collins 17.3, Gibbs 4.98.

Collins leads by 12 through London. Its only win in this series came by 4.

THE REST OF THE CARD

Air Raid Is Owed Two Wins. Kraft Is Not Paying.

Operation: Air Raid (0-6) vs. Kraft’sSuperBowlFormula (2-4) Series: 1-1. Kraft won 2024 Week 11 by 24.46. Air Raid won 2025 Week 13 by 7.4. Through London: 0.0 to 0.0.

One team is 0-6. The other just lost by 86. The schedule has put together a support group.

Taco’s Best Week Came Last Week. Its Worst Came Against TDs.

Taco Bout a W (3-3) vs. TDs & Bad Decisions (3-3) Series: TDs leads 1-0, from a 94.46 to 75.52 win in 2025 Week 8. Through London: Taco 21.6, TDs 15.6.

Taco scored 158 last week. Against TDs, it has never scored more than 76.

Mr Holley Won the Only Meeting by 34. Then Came Last Week.

To Infinity and Bijan (4-2) vs. Mr Holley (4-2) Series: Mr Holley leads 1-0, from a 140.98 to 107.46 win in 2025 Week 12. Through London: 0.0 to 0.0.

Last week Holley scored 85, the lowest total in its history. Bijan has been waiting since 2025 Week 12.